lucieRebekahh

Thursday, 19 January 2017

Why I'd urge my own children to go to University...

lucyRebekahh January 19, 2017 0 Comments

I know more and more people are now attending University however, I also know there are still a huge amount of people who don't go for their own reasons. I would never force my own children into doing something they don't want to do however, after experiencing University myself, I wouldn't definitely urge them to give it a go and this is why...

Firstly, it has nothing to do with the academic side of things - which I know is the main reason why most people go. I don't care if they were not bothered about getting a degree or if the job they wanted didn't need one either, I would still urge them to try it. The reason for this is more due to the life experience and opportunities they will be presented with over the 3 years. I would urge them to go just so they could experience the independence of living away from home with friends, the experience of living in a brand new city and also the chance to try something new.

From being a countryside girl, living in a tiny village where everyone knows one another, going to University and living in a city was such a huge step. However, it's been the best thing I have ever done and so far has been the best few years of my life.

My original decision to go to uni was based on the fact that I wanted a degree in a subject I love but also because I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. However, I have been gaining so much more than another qualification or knowledge of psychology, I have also gained so much life experience. The shy and timid girl I was before, who hated even ordering my own food at a restaurant, is now full of so much confidence and faith in myself that I lacked before. I've noticed it in myself but my family have noticed it in me too and it's a transformation that would not have occurred if I hadn't taken up this opportunity.

So, that is why I would definitely urge my own children to give University a go. It's not just about the education, it's not just about getting that degree, it's about moving away and experiencing something different.... being brave and stepping out of your comfort zone. I know it comes along with the debt (but let's be honest, you never really know it's there due to the way it's all paid back), so even if you're not bothered about a degree, spending 3 years away just for the life experience is more than enough reason to go.

For anyone debating over going to University or feeling nervous at the idea of applying, I felt that exact same way yet it's a few years later and I am so glad that I changed my mind and decided to go.

I've finally found a city that I adore and also made lifelong friends and experienced something I never imagined I would.

It's shaped me into a different person but in the best way possible and I finally feel much more content with where I'm at and the growth I've achieved. Obviously getting that degree and getting to wear that cap and gown is going to be so rewarding at the end of the 3 years however, that won't be the main thing I talk about when sharing my experience. Instead, I'll be focusing on the incredible memories I've made, the funny moments that had me in tears crying and even the most stressful moments where I was on the verge of a breakdown. They are all the key aspects that made my experience what it is and they are all the moments that have helped me grow and become an adult (even though I still don't feel like one), compared to the timid teenager who started a couple of years ago.

I know University isn't for everyone however, what is for everyone is everything else you gain from being apart of that community. Therefore, for that reason, I would definitely urge my own children to give it ago but also anyone else who has ever let that thought cross their mind.

I say take the opportunity and let it carry you in all sorts of directions you never imagined you would go in.

Friday, 28 October 2016

Wellbeing: stepping out of your comfort zone

lucyRebekahh October 28, 2016 0 Comments

'Stepping out of your comfort zone' is probably a phrase you have heard many times and is probably one you will continue to hear. However, that is because it is such an important concept and one that you will find so beneficial to your life and wellbeing.

Stepping out of your comfort zone can mean different things for different people but in general it's all about doing something new and probably a little bit scary. I've always been the type of person who absolutely loves remaining in their little bubble of familiarity as it's much less daunting and much more predictable. However, by doing this I realised I was limiting myself to the bare minimum that I could get out of life and this wasn't a smart move.

Once I came to realise this, I began to make small changes and push myself to do more than I ever thought I could and from this I began achieving things that once seemed impossible. One of the biggest steps for me was when I began Uni 2 years ago. It was something I never imagined myself doing because it was like starting school all over again, yet now you were much older and making friends would take a little more bravery and force than it did when you were younger. Before it was as simple as out rightly asking the girl you were sharing play dough with if she wanted to be best friend. However, now it was more about finding something to talk about and then having to make it interesting enough to keep conversation going in hope of forming a friendship.

Starting uni was not only a huge step out of my comfort zone due to the friend's aspect of things it was also due to moving to a new city. It consisted of moving away from home for the first time, living independently and trying to figure out this new place and decide if I could actually call it my new home. It comes with many challenges along the way but one thing that will always remain, is how good I have felt for doing it.

Moving to a new city and moving away from home has provided me with confidence that I never thought was possible within my shy self. It has provided me with the ability to live without my family and appreciate missing them instead. It has also provided me with skills and knowledge on adult things that I previously had no clue about and most of all, it has been the best experience ever.

Stepping out of my comfort zone was absolutely terrifying but the rewards for doing it overpowered the fear by far. Moving away and going to uni are quite huge milestones but getting out of that familiarity bubble can consist of much minor things too. For example, this year I began volunteering for a charity called Student Minds. I remembered last year when I first applied and it took me about a week to actually hit send on my application due to my nerves for not only the interview but if I managed to get it.

However, now I am beyond happy that I decide to take that jump and just go for it because many months later I am now apart of the incredible charity and doing things I never thought I would. I have made so many amazing new friends, I have had the opportunity to be apart of my uni in a way I never was and it has also provided me with so many new skills. I have been running support sessions within my uni, giving me confidence to lead a group of people which is something I have never felt comfortable doing before.

It has made me realise just how much confidence I do have now as when I sat in my training or sat in the first session I was facilitating, I didn't come across shy at all. Instead, I did it with confidence because this whole experience of stepping out of my comfort zone has made that possible.

The point of this post was not to ramble on about uni, even though I seem to have done that anyway, but it was to highlight how important taking certain scary steps can be. University has been the biggest thing for me in stepping out of my comfort zone however, for others it could be a range of different things. It's unique to every person. But what is the same, it the positive outcome and change it can have on a person. It allows you to experience new things you never thought you would. It allows you to meet new people that you probably would have never considered talking to before. Lastly, it opens your mind to the extensive amount of opportunities that are waiting for you out in the world.

I have made a promise to myself to practice this a lot more and to allow myself to experience life in a way I never did before. Back track a few years and I was a completely different person to the one I am now and I am so grateful for that. However, fast forward a few years and I will probably be a different person again and that isn't a bad thing. Instead, it is just me going out there and experiencing life in it's many different forms which in turn shapes my mind in an incredible way.

Stepping out of your comfort zone can be extremely scary but trust me, it's so worth it in the end!

# advise # blogger

Saturday, 22 October 2016

University: My Room! (decoration inspiration)

lucyRebekahh October 22, 2016 0 Comments

So for my 3rd year I got to move into a new room with all new furniture and this naturally made decorating it so much more fun!

I have a collection of photos below of the different areas of my room showing the ways in which I have made it feel more like home - however, with Christmas coming up, this is still a working process as it begins to look more festive in the coming weeks.

(I printed the quotes around the mirror off myself and the fairylights are from primark)

(this is my favourite spot! my duvet cover is from primark as are my cushions)

(fairylights, more fairylights and a cactus... what more could you possibly need to make a room look pretty?)

(a very empty looking notice board - but I have photos ready to fill it with)!

# ARU # blogger

Wednesday, 10 August 2016

Moving to University: Self-Help Guide

lucyRebekahh August 10, 2016 0 Comments

This time last year I was experiencing a mixture of emotions over the idea of moving to University for my second year. I had a house with my friends and the following month I would be packing up my stuff and moving away for the first time.

From my own experience, I know that you can experience a whirlwind of emotions as one moment you will be completely fine and buzzing with excitement and then the next, you fall into absolute panic and worry. Therefore, I want to provide a few self-help tips to reassure you that it will be okay and also provide some help in getting through it.

1. Prepare Early!

When I first moved, the biggest mistake I made was leaving everything until the last minute. The week before I moved, my mum and I went out shopping and brought everything that I needed to take with me. However, we didn't manage to get everything we needed in time as it was one big rush and just added to the stress.

You have a whole summer to make lists and purchase all the essentials you need for your Uni home, so try and get it all done early! It saves you having to worry about it nearer the time when you probably don't want to think about it.

2. Food shopping.

This moves me nicely onto food shopping. Before you move, try and persuade your parents into taking you shopping a few times to make a collection of basic food items you are going to need while at Uni. Obviously you can't be buying things like milk so far in advance but dry foods you definitely can! If you build up a collection to take early, it will save you so much money!

I took so much food with me when I first moved that I never had to purchase things like rice, couscous, biscuits etc... throughout the year as I always had a secret stock.

Then when you actually move to Uni, it's another great opportunity to make the most of having your parents there the first day. Ask them to take you to the local supermarket and purchase the other basics like milk, butter and other fridge/freezer items. Yet again, it saves you a bit of money and you can take advantage of having their car.

3. Be sympathetic of yourself and lower your expectations.

By this I mean, don't build up any expectations just in case they are not met. Of course it is very likely your first few weeks may be difficult if it's your first time away from home, so don't be too hard on yourself if you feel uncomfortable and sad.

Living in a new place (with potentially new people) can be difficult and it's going to take a while to settle in. It always used to take me a day or two to settle back into the house after being away for the Christmas or Easter holidays and even longer when I had just moved in.

Give yourself time to adjust and accept that it will feel weird to start with. However, don't give up and know that it will get better and soon you will feel much more comfortable living in this strange home than you did before.

4. Have a cup of tea and a good cry!

This is essential. It's okay to cry. The day I moved, I cried non stop all morning... it was as though I was moving away forever. I was scared of the unknown and sad to be leaving my safe little family bubble in the countryside. However, once I had experienced my hours of crying that day and had been dropped off at my Uni house with my friends, I was completely fine again.

I was all cried out, no longer needing to cry anymore and I felt so good for it.

However, I'm not saying that after the first day you should never cry anymore, it's actually the opposite. When you feel like crying because you are home sick, cry. It's okay because you will feel so much better for it afterwards.

Living away from home for the first time can be a lot to cope with alongside your stressful Uni studies and I cried many days due to feeling as though I had an overload of work to do. However, you do get over it and begin to appreciate and enjoy the experience of being away from home.

I definitely had a lot less tears in my second semester however, even if I had have had more, everyone understands! That's the incredible thing about uni, people won't judge you for the tears over missing home or stress as you are all in the same boat.

So, if you feel sad or overwhelmed, just have a good cup of tea and a cry, you will feel so much better afterwards :)

5. Treat your Uni home as your new home.

Moving into a new home for the first time can feel strange and as though it's not your own. You may feel extremely uncomfortable to go about your normal routine because it doesn't feel right. However, this house/flat is going to be your home for the rest of the year so treat it like it is.

Let yourself go about the normal routines that you would at home and you will very quickly feel comfortable in the space you are living in. It can be strange and daunting when you are living with all of these new people but remember that they are feeling the exact same way.

It may feel weird and awkward to begin with but as the year progresses, they will feel a bit more like family and a lot less like strangers.

6. Call your parents!!!

This is my last point and one that is so important but so easily forgotten. You need to remember to pick up the phone and give your parents a call every once and a while. If this is the first time you have moved away from home, the chances are that they are missing you like crazy.

My mum found it so difficult to cope to begin with and actually hated me being away. However, just a simple call to let them know you are okay can completely change their day.

One of the things my mum said to me was that when she knows that i'm okay, she's okay. She worries when she doesn't know if I am or not.

Therefore, that proves that a simple call of reassurance or just to say hello can make your parents day and also your own.

Whether you're calling just for a quick chat or to spill your troubles all on them, it's okay. They will just appreciate hearing your voice.

***

These are just a few tips of my own and things that I have learned from moving away from home. I will definitely be taking my own advice this year and start preparing to move back much earlier than I did last year!

Thank you for reading :)

# blogger # guide

Friday, 29 April 2016

Finding Happiness

lucyRebekahh April 29, 2016 0 Comments

Finding happiness can come from all different places, even to the smallest of things that we end up taking for granted. We can be so consumed by our busy lives and all the stressful things surrounding us that we forget to take a moment and appreciate the positive things.

It's never easy to know exactly what makes you the most happy because everything comes with a downfall. However, it's so important to focus on the small things first and not just place all of your energy on reaching that end goal.

If we focus so much on reaching perfection and waste time focusing on the negatives along the way and ignoring the small pieces of happiness, we are never going to reach that full potential. It is so easy to get caught up living in the future, constantly imagining those things you want to happen instead of living in the here and now but that is such a dangerous way to live.

Life is short, we all know that, but there is so much depth behind that phrase. If you forget to live in the moment and be present, you are wasting away most of your days that you should be treasuring.

One day you will look back and regret the time you spent worrying about the small things because in the end they never really matter. What does matter though is everything else, everything that you shrug off like it's just another daily thing, when in actual fact it is providing you with a happiness you haven't paid enough attention to notice.

Appreciating every little thing that happens in life can of course be difficult but if you begin to be mindful of what is happening around you, instead of just focusing on the future, it makes it much easier.

Then as a result of that, you may start to feel happier in yourself too. Instead of wasting your time trying to reach a certain goal of happiness, whether that be a holiday or having a few days off work... try and focus on the here and now and appreciate each and everything that happens to you.

It may be as simple as a conversation with one of your friends or a whole day out somewhere, but try and treasure each and every moment and focus on how it makes you feel in that precise moment. Don't shrug a piece of happiness off just because it is small and part of your daily routine. Embrace it and allow it to make you feel the benefits instead of wishing for something more.

# advice # blog

Friday, 22 January 2016

How To: Get Organised for the Second Semester of University!

lucyRebekahh January 22, 2016 0 Comments

It doesn't matter if you are first, second or third year at University, the realisation of how unorganised you were last semester has probably dawned on you.

Whether it was due to not doing the extra reading or leaving your deadlines until the last minute, it is a mistake many of us make in first semester and even second too!

This year however, I am determined to change that. I was the most unorganised and scatty person possible first semester and wasn't quite prepared for just how difficult things would be.

Looking back at first year now, I kind of realised how much of a breeze it was. Second year hit me hard and I wasn't prepared in the slightest.

Which is why I have decided to make an attempt at being more organised next semester in hope I will stick to it and make life much easier for myself when deadlines and exam week come around.

I thought I would share a few tips and essential equipment I feel are important to do this.

The Essentials:

♥ Notepads for each subject reading and coursework planning.

♥ Pens

♥ Highlighters

♥ Gel pens

♥ Pencils

♥ Felt tips

♥ Text books

My tips on how to get more organised:

♥ Creating revision notes as you go along

By doing this you are saving so much time when your exams come around in May. I always find that a few weeks before my exams I am trying to create 3 or 4 modules worth of revision notes and I just don't have the time.
By making revision notes as soon as you have had a lecture or done the extra reading, it means you are already prepared for your exam period. So instead of wasting your time writing up your revision notes, you can actually be revising!
Doing this will also help you understand the topic more as you go along and instead of last minute, right before the exam.

♥ Save at least an hour or two a night to do extra reading after a day of lectures

This fits in nicely with both using your time wisely and also writing up a plan. If you plan out when your free time is and when you're busy with other things, it's much easier to set a specific time for studying.

This doesn't work for some people, but I find if I have something written in my calendar on my laptop and a notification pops up to remind me, I feel guilty if I don't do as it says. It gives me some motivation to do the work instead of wasting my time on Netflix or something unproductive.

♥ Use a calendar

The calendar on my laptop is my favourite thing ever! I am literally obsessed and it's so lame. I have a diary too which I love to keep on my desk but for reminders I always reach for the one on my laptop.
I have Windows 10 so it's on the start page of my apps, making it really quick and easy to reach. I literally store my life plans in this place and as I spend a lot of time on my laptop it's super accessible.

It's always popping up with notifications of whatever I have going on that day, meaning I constantly have a reminder.

♥ Take time to yourself

This is so important and if you don't do this, you'll end up driving yourself mad. Whether it's just watching Netflix, going shopping with your friends or some other kind of hobby; find something that you enjoy.
It can literally be anything, just ensure that you dedicate a part of your day to that specific activity. That way your mind is not always on that piece of coursework you have to hand in or that reading you still haven't done; you can take a moment to tear yourself away from it.

♥ Focus on the end goal

Don't focus on the fact that your deadline is months away and you can deal with it later. Focus on how you will feel in those few months if things go wrong and you run out of time to create your best piece of work.

This is so important and a mistake that most of us probably make. I have such a bad habit of shrugging things off because I think I have all the time in the world to finish them. Whether that be revising or coursework, I keep putting it off until it's the last minute when I have no choice but to do it.
This is so bad for you because it just automatically leads to stress. You need to try and focus on the future a little while you're studying and I don't mean what career you're going to do and how you're going to spend the rest of your life, I mean deadlines!
Know your deadlines and keep them in mind and ensure to keep reminding yourself of them - don't want until the last minute to consider them.

# coursework # exams

Sunday, 13 December 2015

Moving away from home... my experience!

lucyRebekahh December 13, 2015 3 Comments

So this year I conquered a pretty big milestone in my life and that was moving away from home for the first time!

I am currently a second year Psychology student and as my University is only about 40 minutes away from my home, I remained at home for my first year.

However, in my second year I decided the commuting was getting a little too much and I decided to live away from home in a house with my friends.

The first week was the toughest and took a lot of getting used to. Living in a new house was strange enough but living in a city in comparison to the countryside was a whole different world.

Just being away from home and my family who all live so close to me was the hardest part as it was extremely difficult not seeing them everyday.

However, eventually I got used to it and as soon as lectures began I was straight back into routine and settled in quickly.

I have now been living away from home for 12 weeks and that time has just flown by. It has been the most amazing experience while at the same time being a complete roller coaster of emotions, all of which I have managed to get through!

I love the independence and freedom of living in a city. The incredible feeling of being able to just nip to town if I want to, with it being two minutes walking distance me and my friend have found ourselves spending a lot of time there.

I also love having the cinema so close by too! I don't think I have ever seen so many movies in such a short space of time.

Cooking dinner for myself has also not been such an issue. I thought I would absolutely hate it and never be bothered but it's actually nice to have the freedom to have exactly what I want, when I want. Food shopping has now become one of my favourite things - a sign of growing up!

Adult home duties such as cleaning, clothes washing and doing the washing up haven't been my favourite thing. I don't think cleaning will ever be a fun task but you just make of it what you can.
They tend to be the chores I end up doing on a Friday. I finish at 2pm so it gives me a good few hours in the afternoon to put my adult head on and get to work.

Living in the company of my friend 24/7 has also been so much fun! Living with friends in general is just the best experience ever. I know some people say you should never live with a bestfriend because it will ruin the friendship but I don't think that's true. It depends on the person but I definitely think it can make you closer.

Me and my friend literally do everything together, we even have every class at Uni together and we've managed to not drive one another insane yet!

We have traditions throughout the week too, including our date night Tuesday - basically where we go out for dinner every Tuesday instead of cooking. We also ensure to take regular trips to the cinema and shopping too - which at the beginning of the year were a Wednesday tradition but have now turned into an everyday thing, oops.

Living away from my family as I mentioned was difficult at the start, however you just get used to it. I have weekly phone calls with my mum and sister and keep in touch with others by text. You gain so much independence and confidence while living away that you eventually become less dependent on your family and learn to go at it alone. I also think it gives you the advantage of having the best of both worlds; you can live away, doing your own thing and go home and visit your family when you want to.

For anyone thinking of moving away from home, whether that be for Uni or personal reasons, I say go for it! It shapes you into a completely different person and takes you out of that routine you have got so use to at home. It has also made me realise how much more to life there is outside of a village in the countryside... so I definitely will be remain living in a city!

# experience # lifestyle