Showing posts with label student. Show all posts
Showing posts with label student. Show all posts

Thursday, 22 March 2018

Learning to live with Procrastination

March 22, 2018 0 Comments

As I sit up my kitchen side, staring at my laptop screen while desperately trying to make a start on an assignment, I felt like now was the best time to write a post about procrastination.

Procrastination is something I am almost certain that everyone experiences at some point in their university lives (or life in general), and for some of us, it happens on the daily. This can cause a bit of a tricky situation, where that inability to force ourselves to do an assignment only ends up causing a huge amount of stress in the long run. At the time, it's so difficult to convince yourself that you'll be suffering much more from the decisions you are making now. Even if you're aware of that fact, for some reason, your brain just doesn't want to process that fact and take action. So instead, we continue to sit and stare at a blank word document and waste a whole day doing absolutely nothing, out of guilt for doing anything but that.

It doesn't really make sense when you think about it. So fair enough, it's going to be one of those days where you just can't produce a single sentence without checking your phone or staring out of the window. However, why should that mean that we waste a whole day doing absolutely nothing because of it? I don't know about you but when I find myself procrastinating, I'll find small and useless things to do while just sitting in front of that piece of work. For some reason, I feel guilty if I step away from my laptop screen and do something a little more productive, because then I'm no longer paying any attention to the assignment that should be in front of me. So as a result, I just end up wasting a whole day sat in front of my laptop screen, doing absolutely nothing, but still manage to feel a sense of achievement at the fact that I 'tried', when in actual fact, I just wasted a day.

That's where learning how to deal with procrastination can really come in handy. Being able to notice when you're doing it and pull away from the guilt you experience by not doing your work, and distract your mind by doing something else instead.
It's about learning to pull yourself away from that blank word document and teach your mind that it's okay to step away if you're incapable of being productive. It's okay to take a couple of hours off, or even a whole day because as a result, you'll be allowing yourself time to do something more enjoyable and also productive with that time. In addition, that time away may even provide you with a little motivation to sit down and get a few paragraphs written over a few days. Or it may even give you enough motivation to get the whole thing finished way before the deadline date, and escape all that last minute stress.

Procrastination can be incredibly difficult to live with because it consumes you with guilt, which leads to frustration, which ends up adding to the procrastination you are already experiencing.
Learning to accept you're having an off day is the key to overcoming it.
Learning to appreciate writing a few sentences as a success when you're really struggling, is the best way to remove the guilt and to keep on going.
Learning to allow yourself some time away from those deadlines to refresh your mind, can really help avoid those few days of stress as you reach a final deadline and still have a tonne of the assignment left to complete.

Procrastination can be difficult to live with, but it is possible to learn to live with it too. It's all about training your mind to remove the guilt you feel and instead, feel that time with something else productive that you're going to gain a little more enjoyment from until you regain your motivation!

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Saturday, 17 March 2018

University: End of Semester Stress & Putting Your Mental Health First

March 17, 2018 0 Comments

If you are a University student, you will probably be able to relate to that huge mood changer that comes along when the end of a semester is in sight, whether that be the build up to the Christmas holidays, or the month of May when final deadlines are handed in and exams begin.

It can be very easy to get caught up in the panic and stress of how much work you have to do and then in return feeling like your head is going to explode. The idea of working through essay after essay and then having to spend the few weeks building up to exams shut away in your room revising can become very overwhelming. However, amongst all of this, it is so important to always put your mental health first.

If you don't feel right in yourself and you're not in the right frame of mind to focus, then it's only going to make matters worse. Until you begin to look after your mental health, you're never going to be able to put your best self forward, to finish off the essays and revise for those exams. Therefore, it should always be your primary focus, guilt free.

Stress is something I have always struggled with throughout my academic years and it has also linked closely with my anxiety. Therefore, around this time of the year my whole body becomes extremely sensitive to every little thing that's happening around me and can trigger the worst at any point.

The overload of work and things to be thinking/worrying about can all get a bit too much and with each year of University I have always experienced that sudden break down, where I just want to cry and give up. However, each time this has happened I have always been able to look back and feel extremely glad that I never did.

Although it is very normal to get stressed over exams/deadlines, it's not okay to let it consume your mind and take over your life. Your mental health is much more important than getting a good grade. You need to focus on getting yourself well, happy, and in the right mindset to continue.

I may not have it all figured out just yet, but I have learned that when I begin to feel overwhelmed, it is time to take a step back. I don't feel guilty for taking some time to myself, whether that be taking a walk in the fresh air or taking a few days off from work completely. Either way, I know it's so important to allow myself that time, so I can come back and feel ready to tackle those deadlines once again.

If you ever feel like you're struggling and feel overloaded with deadlines that you can't cope with, take a step back. Speak to your housemate, a close friend, or even contact your university's wellbeing service for a bit of support. You are most definitely not alone, and I can assure you that so many people will be able to relate and will be very willing to help you out.

You shouldn't ever have to feel alone through these critical moments in your degree. Make sure you are looking after yourself and getting the help and support when you need it. You're fully capable of reaching the end and finishing your degree, and you will do it.

When people say you can only do your best, that doesn't mean working yourself so hard that it leads to a breakdown and puts your mental health at risk. Instead, do your best while being aware of your limits and take a steadier approach to success. Always put your mental health first.

Tuesday, 23 January 2018

Graduation Nerves: What's Next?

January 23, 2018 0 Comments

Rewind a few years ago, I never thought that the day would come where I would be finishing my undergraduate degree, let alone starting a Masters. The past few years have been a complete whirlwind, with every plan that I've made regarding my future, falling apart when something else comes up instead.

Although I am the type of person who loves to plan and has some sort of idea what the future may hold, I've enjoyed the unexpectedness of how each year has played out for me. It has made me realise that sometimes it's better to take a step back from trying to control every aspect of your life and let fate take the lead. It has ended up allowing me to take up some of the most amazing opportunities and experiences of my life.

It can be incredibly daunting to be a 3rd year student going into the final semester. I remember feeling exactly like that last year when I wasn't sure what I wanted to do once I had finished university. I knew that I wasn't ready to leave it behind and I still had so much more to learn, but I still didn't have the faintest clue of what to do next.

It can be incredibly tempting to spend your final semester planning every aspect of your life for once you graduate, but this can be unhealthy. It can make your final few months pass so quickly without giving you chance to fully appreciate them. Although some degree of planning is needed, as you may have to send off applications or figure out what kind of career you want, you must not let it consume your final semester.

It doesn't matter if you don't have your whole life planned out. It doesn't matter if you don't know what kind of job you want or whether you want to extend your education for a little bit longer. Nobody expects you to come out of university and suddenly achieve every dream that you had originally set out to accomplish, so you shouldn't put that pressure on yourself either.

Finishing university can feel like you're finally stepping into the huge and scary adult world, where you suddenly need to grow up and get a lifetime career. Although a lot of people do jump into careers they have been working so hard for, this doesn't have to be the case for everyone.

Leaving university doesn't have to be a scary time: it can be exciting too! It's down to you to make it that way.

There is no rule book that signifies that you have to leave university and immediately start working towards your long-term career goals. Instead it can be a chance to do everything you never had the chance to do before you headed off to university. Perhaps you always wanted to take a gap year and go travelling but had never had the confidence before. Now is your time to try it! Maybe you just want to get a short-term job and experience living in another city for a year. Now is your time to try it! Or maybe you want to further your education and get a Masters in the topics that interest you most. Now is, also, the time to try it!

Whatever it is that you really want to do, you should give yourself the chance to finally experience that, completely guilt-free. Graduating from university doesn't have to be the start of that mature adult life, where you feel like you need to suddenly grow up. Instead, it can be a continuation of how you've spent your past three years at university - a time to have some fun and find out who you are as a person.

Don't let the end of university be consumed with fear and pressures to suddenly pursue the career you've been working towards. Let it be a celebration of what you have achieved and take the next few years to do the things you've always wanted to do!


Tuesday, 19 September 2017

Anxiety: Your Own Worst Enemy

September 19, 2017 0 Comments
Making plans and getting excited. Dreading them the day before or chickening out and changing your mind. Reaching for opportunities but turning them down when they are passed your way. Constantly battling with your anxious self that ruins every chance to have fun or do something different. Constantly feeling angry that you are and will always be your own worst enemy.



Anxiety comes in lots of different forms and falls in a range of places on a spectrum however, one thing they all have in common, is that you are always your own worst enemy. One day you can make a plan that you'll feel so much joy and excitement for but when it very quickly comes around, you feel nothing but fear. It doesn't make sense and there is no logical explanation for it but that anxious part of your mind is on high alert and nothing you do can control it.

Trying to explain to someone why you suddenly don't feel up to doing something can feel utterly impossible. How can you explain something that you don't even understand yourself?

The idea of getting up, getting ready and heading out and spending the day away from your comfort spot, suddenly feels like the worst and most terrifying experience. You could be travelling 5 minutes down the road or you could be travelling an hour. It doesn't matter. The fear will feel the same.


There may be many occasions where you have been incredibly excited about something, whether that be a day out or an opportunity being passed your way however, it doesn't take long for that excitement to be destroyed. You start to feel physically sick and overwhelmed with dread. Your heart begins beating so fast and you suddenly feel a sense of danger.

Nothing has changed, everything is as safe as it previously was but you just feel anxious. You start to fear it and start to only see the negatives and potential dangers - your mind becomes consumed as it considers every possible risk associated with whatever it is you're doing.

This dread leads to avoidance and avoidance is one of the biggest issues when dealing with anxiety. It's a safety behaviour used to to feel secure and in control again, to help you cope however, in reality it does the total opposite.


Feeling anxious about general life is another one of those issues that just never makes any sense. Waking up every single day with a feeling of dread about nothing in particular and not being able to comprehend what is even running through your mind. Not being able to sleep at night because you suddenly remind yourself of everything that is wrong and everything that you should be worrying about rather than soaking it up and making the best of it.

One thing that is consistent though, is the constant buzz in your mind which never gives you a break. The ability to relax and to just take some time to yourself becomes utterly impossible when you can't block out the many thoughts bouncing around and trying to cause you worry.

It's a constant battle with yourself to try and push them away, only to make them come back harsher and more terrifying.

That overwhelming experience when you are sat in a silent room but your mind just won't rest. You try your hardest to think of nothing and just block out every single thing that pops into your mind but it becomes impossible.

It's unbearable because all you want and need to do is rest but even if you're not physically moving you still feel so exhausted. Your body may not be working but your mind is on full alert and it never seems to stop.


Although it's so difficult to comprehend and explain as you can't quite make sense of it yourself, that just highlights the worst part of the whole experience. You are always going to be your own worst enemy. Nothing is happening around you to cause the dread, fear and panic, it's constantly in your own mind; they are your own thoughts that surely you should be able to control?


It sounds like the solution should be simple when you look at it that way. 'Just stop thinking about it. Stop letting the thoughts drop into your mind.' But it's never really that easy. Thoughts are dominant, whether they are good or bad. Your brain is incredibly powerful. However, it is possible to take gradual steps to gain control of your own mind and worry once again.

Anxiety will have its high and lows. You will have good days and bad days and that's okay. You may go a week or more, feeling amazing and in control. You may suddenly feel like you could never feel as bad as you once did.

But dealing with anxiety and recovering from that consistent panic and worry is not a linear progress. It's going to have it's ups and downs so it's about persevering and trusting yourself. Try not to beat yourself up about it and remember tomorrow is a new day to try all over again.

We will always be our own worst enemy and the one who will give us the hardest time however, that is never going to be productive and only make things worse. Be patient with your mind, reach out for help and know that you are capable of gaining that control back. It just takes time.



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If you're currently struggling with Anxiety, please make sure to reach out to your GP or local mental health service. There is support out there, it's just about taking that huge step to getting some help.

If you have a story or experience to share regarding your own Anxiety and you're currently a student, check out the Student Minds blog. It's the UK's national student mental health blog and we're always looking for more people to join the team and write for us!

For more information click here or email us at blog@studentminds.org.uk and we'll get back in touch!

Wednesday, 26 July 2017

Mental Health - The Importance of Supporting Others

July 26, 2017 0 Comments
I believe that one of the biggest struggles when it comes to Mental Health is due to embarrassment and the stigma surrounding it. I think the fear of talking about the difficulties can feed into an endless cycle of someone feeling more and more isolated, which can lead to things becoming ten times worse.

This is why I strongly believe that there should be an incredible emphasis placed on the support of others, and not just our own friends and family, strangers too. Being tolerant and accepting of how other people feel and what others are going through, no matter how well you know them can have the most amazing affects on mental health related difficulties.


At University, I volunteer for a charity called Student Minds, whereby we run support sessions for fellow students who have mental health difficulties. We have two support groups; Positive Minds (for low mood and mild depression) and Eating Difficulties.

The idea of these support groups isn't for us to hand out a diagnosis or provide any sort of counselling and instead, it is to provide support and a safe place for people to go to let off a bit of steam. By doing this, it really opened my eyes to how beneficial simply listening to someone can be.

The kind of feedback we received from those who attended the groups was based around how good it felt to have somewhere to turn when they felt most alone. Some would explain how they just couldn't talk to their own friends and family about what they were going through because they didn't understand. Some emphasised how good it felt to talk to like-minded people as they felt less judged. All in all, those who attended came because of the support and because the atmosphere made them feel accepted rather than the odd one out.

It felt amazing to provide something so important for people who felt like they lacked that support beforehand. It really made me aware of the importance of supporting others whether they are your friends, family or complete strangers.


The more we make sure those suffering with mental health difficulties feel included rather than isolated, the better they can begin to feel in themselves. We sometimes don't realise how our own actions and our own words can affect someone else who is going through a tough time.

It's crazy how many times someone has said to me 'I can't tell my friend because they just won't understand' or 'my family just doesn't get it'. It's heartbreaking to hear but I can totally relate to that feeling where it just seems like they couldn't possibly know what you are going through.

Sometimes, this can be inaccurate and it's more due to your own fears of the stigma that lingers in society. A lot of the time your family and friends probably would understand but your own fear of speaking up can prevent them from being able to give you the support. However, for those who are surrounded by people who truly do not understand, it can be incredibly difficult and make things so much worse.

Therefore, if you take anything away from this post, it is that your support and ability to understand is so important. Whether the person is your best friend, brother or even a complete stranger, showing them some empathy and that you are willing to listen if they reach out can make all the difference to their struggles.

Maybe you will be the one to reach out to them and ask how they are doing, or maybe they will show signs that they want to open up to you. Either way, providing them with that safe space and reassurance that even if you don't fully understand you'd never judge them for it, can make a huge positive impact on whatever they are going through.

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Friday, 17 March 2017

The Truth About Being a Third Year University Student

March 17, 2017 0 Comments

When in first and second year, I heard so many people say how tough third year is however, I never realised how different things would be by this point. University has definitely been a journey but third year has been one in it's own right and below I have made a list of nine truths that I have picked up from it so far.


1. Early nights will be an everyday kind of thing -


Since being in third year I have rarely been able to stay up past midnight. I don't know if it's the earlier mornings or the mental stress that has increased over the years but I am always extremely exhausted by dinner time.

While in first and second year I could easily stay up well into the early hours of the morning but I have now resorted to my elderly self and end up in bed by 10pm.



2. No one prepares you for the stress and pressure you will feel 24/7 -


First year is a breeze, second year is when you start to take things a bit more seriously however, when third year arrives, you'll find yourself having nightmares about the extensive amount of work you have to do.

All of the work you do in third year (minus one module for us) counts towards your degree and therefore, that means you instantly feel the pressure to work hard and get your best grades. However, this doesn't come easily when you have deadlines, exams, a presentation to prepare for, a dissertation to write and volunteering on the side. As you tick things off your 'to do list', you're only adding more things on and it becomes an endless cycle of feeling constantly behind.


3. You will continue to deny the existence of your dissertation for as long as possible -


When you don't have weekly lectures to attend to regarding it and the whole thing is down to your independent scheduling, it is so easy to pretend it doesn't exist. The stress of carrying out a research project, analysing the data and then writing 8,000 words on it, doesn't sound like a lot of fun. Therefore, it becomes a repetitive cycle of pretending you have all the time in the world when instead, the clock is ticking down fast.


4. Your dissertation process is nothing like you expected it to be -


As a Psychology student we carry out a piece of independent research for our dissertation and then produce a write up of it. A huge part of that is obviously the data collection aspect and when I was a first and second year student I thought this would be the super easy however, that is so far from the truth. 

Getting participants to take part in your study is a case of begging and pleading people who are reluctant to do it just so you can scrape the target number you put on your ethics. This results in spending a lot of your time wishing you had picked a different idea or chosen a much smaller target sample number. 

Unfortunately though as a second year student planning your idea, you were too enthusiastic for the following year to ever understand how much stress you were placing on yourself.


5. Your overdraft will become your best friend -


The idea of going into my overdraft during first or second year was absolutely terrifying and I did everything to ensure I stayed well clear of it. However, fast forward to third year and I have spent the whole of semester 1 and 2 just sitting comfortably in a sea of negative numbers. It no longer feels like the end of the world and just becomes the norm.


6. You will realise that although you have gained a good set of 'adulting' skills - cooking probably isn't one of them -


After a couple of years experience of having to cook for myself, you'd think I'd have the whole cooking thing perfected by now - or near enough anyway. However, it is most definitely the opposite and I feel as though I am getting worse. Although I always have good intensions and tell myself I will follow a real recipe one night, by dinner time I am usually too exhausted to cook anything fancy and opt for something like pasta instead.


7. You will have learned to deal with the most random situations over the three years of living away. Nothing will ever faze you again!


Here are a few personal examples...

1. Using outside as a fridge for a week when our one decided to break on us
2. Finding the biggest slugs sitting under the fridge at night yet not knowing how they got in
3. Having a leak dripping from the kitchen ceiling which was coming straight from the bathroom
4. Having to collect water from a broken washing machine with a beer glass and it taking about 20 trips to and from the sink
5. Constant power cuts due to the mystery electrical item triggering the the main switch
6. Having unwelcoming visits from bed bugs in my friends room and figuring out how to get rid of them
7. Living with eight plus different people within only two semesters - not knowing who will be coming or going next becomes the norm
8. Realising the way to fix a squeaky door is to use hair serum spray!
9. and living in a loud building site throughout an important exam period and still managing to get some of my best grades


8. You will find friends that will last a lifetime -


In my opinion, the key to a successful and happy university experience is finding people who you can share the experience with. When moving away from your family, creating a 'university family' will make getting through those tough times so much easier. 

These will be the people you tackle the stress with, learn all the adult skills with and enjoy all the happy times with too. They will be the strangers you met for the first time a few years ago and chances are, you will probably remember that first awkward conversation too! They will feel like a family and as though you have known them all your life and that's because you have experienced some of the most crucial skills and life lessons alongside them.


9. You will look back and realise how much you have changed over the past few years -


One of the biggest things I have gained from attending Uni is confidence. 

If I look back at the girl who arrived on her first day of first year, she is far from the person I am now. I have done some things since being here that I never would have done a few years ago and it's given me the confidence to tackle the big and the small hurdles I have faced.


Although third year may be stressful, it is the happiest I have been in a very long time. I feel like I have learned so much and grown as a person over the past few years that I'm much more content and confident in my self and abilities.

There is still a long way to go with a lot of deadlines and exams to complete but all the stress will definitely be worth it on graduation. Alongside being awarded my degree, I will also be able to appreciate and reflect back on all the life skills I have picked up along the way.

Wednesday, 10 August 2016

Moving to University: Self-Help Guide

August 10, 2016 0 Comments
This time last year I was experiencing a mixture of emotions over the idea of moving to University for my second year. I had a house with my friends and the following month I would be packing up my stuff and moving away for the first time.
From my own experience, I know that you can experience a whirlwind of emotions as one moment you will be completely fine and buzzing with excitement and then the next, you fall into absolute panic and worry. Therefore, I want to provide a few self-help tips to reassure you that it will be okay and also provide some help in getting through it.



1. Prepare Early!

When I first moved, the biggest mistake I made was leaving everything until the last minute. The week before I moved, my mum and I went out shopping and brought everything that I needed to take with me. However, we didn't manage to get everything we needed in time as it was one big rush and just added to the stress.


You have a whole summer to make lists and purchase all the essentials you need for your Uni home, so try and get it all done early! It saves you having to worry about it nearer the time when you probably don't want to think about it.


2. Food shopping.

This moves me nicely onto food shopping. Before you move, try and persuade your parents into taking you shopping a few times to make a collection of basic food items you are going to need while at Uni. Obviously you can't be buying things like milk so far in advance but dry foods you definitely can! If you build up a collection to take early, it will save you so much money!

I took so much food with me when I first moved that I never had to purchase things like rice, couscous, biscuits etc... throughout the year as I always had a secret stock.

Then when you actually move to Uni, it's another great opportunity to make the most of having your parents there the first day. Ask them to take you to the local supermarket and purchase the other basics like milk, butter and other fridge/freezer items. Yet again, it saves you a bit of money and you can take advantage of having their car.

3. Be sympathetic of yourself and lower your expectations.

By this I mean, don't build up any expectations just in case they are not met. Of course it is very likely your first few weeks may be difficult if it's your first time away from home, so don't be too hard on yourself if you feel uncomfortable and sad.

Living in a new place (with potentially new people) can be difficult and it's going to take a while to settle in. It always used to take me a day or two to settle back into the house after being away for the Christmas or Easter holidays and even longer when I had just moved in.

Give yourself time to adjust and accept that it will feel weird to start with. However, don't give up and know that it will get better and soon you will feel much more comfortable living in this strange home than you did before.

4. Have a cup of tea and a good cry!

This is essential. It's okay to cry. The day I moved, I cried non stop all morning... it was as though I was moving away forever. I was scared of the unknown and sad to be leaving my safe little family bubble in the countryside. However, once I had experienced my hours of crying that day and had been dropped off at my Uni house with my friends, I was completely fine again.
I was all cried out, no longer needing to cry anymore and I felt so good for it.

However, I'm not saying that after the first day you should never cry anymore, it's actually the opposite. When you feel like crying because you are home sick, cry. It's okay because you will feel so much better for it afterwards.

Living away from home for the first time can be a lot to cope with alongside your stressful Uni studies and I cried many days due to feeling as though I had an overload of work to do. However, you do get over it and begin to appreciate and enjoy the experience of being away from home.

I definitely had a lot less tears in my second semester however, even if I had have had more, everyone understands! That's the incredible thing about uni, people won't judge you for the tears over missing home or stress as you are all in the same boat.

So, if you feel sad or overwhelmed, just have a good cup of tea and a cry, you will feel so much better afterwards :)


5. Treat your Uni home as your new home.

Moving into a new home for the first time can feel strange and as though it's not your own. You may feel extremely uncomfortable to go about your normal routine because it doesn't feel right. However, this house/flat is going to be your home for the rest of the year so treat it like it is.

Let yourself go about the normal routines that you would at home and you will very quickly feel comfortable in the space you are living in. It can be strange and daunting when you are living with all of these new people but remember that they are feeling the exact same way.
It may feel weird and awkward to begin with but as the year progresses, they will feel a bit more like family and a lot less like strangers.


6. Call your parents!!!

This is my last point and one that is so important but so easily forgotten. You need to remember to pick up the phone and give your parents a call every once and a while. If this is the first time you have moved away from home, the chances are that they are missing you like crazy. 

My mum found it so difficult to cope to begin with and actually hated me being away. However, just a simple call to let them know you are okay can completely change their day.

One of the things my mum said to me was that when she knows that i'm okay, she's okay. She worries when she doesn't know if I am or not.

Therefore, that proves that a simple call of reassurance or just to say hello can make your parents day and also your own. 

Whether you're calling just for a quick chat or to spill your troubles all on them, it's okay. They will just appreciate hearing your voice.

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These are just a few tips of my own and things that I have learned from moving away from home. I will definitely be taking my own advice this year and start preparing to move back much earlier than I did last year!

Thank you for reading :)